The Squirrells in my yard are Democrats

I think the squirrels in my yard are Democrats! In fact, I am sure of it. I have been able to capture four of them in a cage thinking my yard would be legitimately free of those pests. I looked out my back window to surprisingly find that there are two more. They won’t go away. They keep coming at me even though I don’t want anything to do with them. They seem to want to rule over me. They refuse to recognize that my yard is for me and by me.

The reason I don’t want the squirrels in my backyard is because they eat the food that I put out for the birds in the bird sanctuary. In other words, they are taking what is not theirs. They use it for what they want with no regard to the birds. They even go to great lengths for their own benefit by climbing up poles to get to what is not theirs.

Sometimes they come on my back porch and stare at me as to say that I have no authority over them with their tails flying in the wind. The innocent look that they present obviously wants me to believe what is not true saying that they are there for my own good and entertainment. They scatter about and chase each other. They go up trees and jump on branches. They have no regard for any boundaries.

I have gone to great lengths to control them. No matter what I have done they are insistent to be in my backyard! They need to just go away and do whatever they want somewhere else in some other country. These squirrels are actually rats legally roaming in the neighborhood. No one else has either tried or wants to try to put some regulation on them. I have read several books that Constitutes what should bring peace and rule of order to my yard. I am certain I saw one of them tearing a page out of my book.

In the past I relied on people who said that they understood my plight. They told me they would step forward in my behalf if I just voted to allow them into my yard. The problem, I discovered, is that the rescuers have been self-serving with no action plan. In other words, they capitulated to the squirrels!

If they have their way, they will take everything I have even at great expense for their own purpose. They gobble up as much as they can as fast as they can. All these creatures need is their own Capital Building where they can gather and share future plans to torment me. Surely, they are laughing at me for my own ineptitude against them while they secretly store away nuts without my permission. I am sure that I overheard one of them say that I would know where the nuts are located after I vote to accept them.

Hopefully by this fall, something will change, and they will go away. At this point I would even welcome a Lion who will rid me of my torment. I need someone in the animal kingdom to represent me. I need someone who understands my dilemma. Can we gather together this fall joining together in a massive response to those “things” that have invaded my land? My fear is that someday I will be planted in the ground and those same squirrels will dance on my grave.

Is there any hope for my yard?!

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