There are those who say that the apostle Paul was anti-female. Parts of this chapter approved that is utter nonsense. The passage speaks of women submitting themselves to the husband. That means they have voluntary options to do so. In those days women were considered possessions and had no rights. It’s quite a contrast to go from a woman who has no right to a woman who has options. The same is true of husbands in this chapter. Paul expected them to have an entirely different attitude toward the woman he married. It is interesting to see the contrast between the current culture and what God expected. Let us look at the Scriptures so that we may see how they can be applied to our current lives.
Versus 1 to 20 admonish us be careful how we walk before the Lord and before the world. There is a contrast between darkness and light. There is a contrast between casual conversation that can be offensive verses conversation that comes from a Christian heart. There is a contrast between what is acceptable to the Lord and the unfruitful works of darkness. There’s a contrast between those who sleep spiritually and those who walk wisely redeeming the time. There is a contrast between drunkenness to access and a proper response to God in many ways giving thanks to him.
Most of the rest of the chapter deals with the thought of submission. The next verse is a challenge for everyone to submit to everyone else. What does that mean? If someone else makes a statement of biblical authority or seeks to walk in a righteous manner, our challenge is to submit to or support his efforts and his leadership.
One of the main reasons that marriage is so sacred before God is that it is a representative of the relationship that Christ has with the church. There is no doubt that Christ is the head of the church. We who are members of the body of Christ are subject to him. The intention of Jesus toward the members of the body, the church, is a holy connection and a righteous demonstration in which believers fulfill the will of God. This is why Paul draws a comparison between the wife and the husband. She is to be cooperative in his efforts to honor God. She is to be his helpmate as designed in the Garden of Eden by God himself. In no way is she a slave or servant or to be viewed in a lower status. The wife similar to the church is to be available to her husband and God’s leadership.
The husband is to love his wife as his own body. A man of healthy mind and spirit will take great care of his own physical being. He will see that it’s cleansed. He will see that it is nurtured. He will see that it is protected. He will see that is cherished. All these things are attitudes the husband must have toward his wife. But let’s take a closer look to see how this can be applied today.
A wise husband will listen four times more than he talks to his wife. He will take note for how she wants to be treated and cared for. He will not lecture. He will not rescue her when she shares a problem that has become debatable in her own mind. He will seek opportunities in which he can be kind. Something simple as asking if she wants something from the kitchen when he gets up is actually very important. A husband who seeks to do favors without being asked is wise. Patience toward his wife is very valuable to her. The demonstration of his love is not always physical. It is verbal. It is silence. It is support when she is troubled. It is recognizing empathy that she needs. The husband who waits for his wife to make decisions has learned a great lesson. In public he must never allow her to be put on the defensive or humiliated. When the book of Revelation talks of the church being the bride of Christ dressed in white can be taken as a symbol as how the husband of today wants to do everything possible for her to become her best possible.
The wise wife will take note of every effort her husband is making to provide righteous leadership in the home. She will be very conscious that her part of the marriage is to be his other half which means they are joined in union with her support and kindness. She provides what he cannot, and he provides which she cannot emotionally and mentally. In the case of their union nothing, nothing, nothing must ever, ever, ever be allowed to come between them. She will be his defense and cheerleader. A biblical wife is absorbed in the biblical understanding of what it was for that particular man to become her husband. It was a dynamic change in his lifestyle and attitude to bring this woman to a place where they can together build a home. This is so similar to what it takes for the true believer to be submissive to Christ in the building of the church. She and her husband share a mutual goal of following God’s leadership just as the church must do.
Christian Writer 